September Horoscopes

Aries: Banging your head against the wall won’t reverse your headache

Taurus: Stop straightening your hair it looks good curly!

Gemini: Quit arguing with your mom, she loves you.

Cancer: Very superstitious…writing’s on the wall…

Leo: Your phone screen WILL hurt your eyes one day.

Virgo: I know you’re super excited about the leaves changing color, live your life.

Libra: Go ahead and whip out those turtlenecks, I know you want to.

Scorpio: Do you remember, the 21st night of September?

Sagittarius: Buying a fish tank and filling it with jello isn’t a good idea.

Capricorn: Try to read a book sometimes sweetie.

Aquarius: You cute.

Pisces: Whoo Whoo Whoo Whoo Wh-